Medicated, wife will leave me zoloft
Worried my wife will leave me
I am the medicated partner. Married 14 years with 2 kids. In the last 4 years I have been through serious anxiety over a job I regretted taking and a massive shoulder injury. Was already taking 50 mg Zoloft for GAD but then given 2 mg of Abilify for obsessive thoughts. The abilify is EXTREMELY powerful. I have tried getting off 3 times and failed, always reinstating the Abilify 2mg. When I’m on the medication I am a boring zombie with cognitive issues. When I am off the medication I am a nervous wreck with performance anxiety sexually and really needy and pathetic. Currently I am trying to stabilize at 1 mg after failing to taper off.
My wife is unmedicated, getting an advanced degree, taking ozempic and losing weight fast, her social life is bursting. Her confidence is sky high. Shas happy and vibrant. She has become avoidant of me. I feel an enormous amount of pressure to be fun, satisfy her sexually, make her laugh, be an attractive version of me when right now I hate myself and have extremely low self confidence. I feel like the Abilify has broken me. I feel like if I don’t turn things around fast, my wife will divorce me and I will lose half or more of my time with my kids and have to move in with my mother at age 40. All I want is for her to say she loves me and she will be patient with me as I try to get my mental health back, but I try to put on my best fake, confident manliest attitude to mask how terrified I am. Whenever she initiates sex I delay her so I can take a viagra to perform due to performance anxiety. Being honest and vulnerable with her might be the last straw for her. I need my confidence and my “mojo” back but I’m afraid I have been changed forever and my life is going to hell. Thanks for reading my long post…anyone else feel like they are struggling to run on fumes and put on an act in order to keep their relationship intact?
